Cold by luv

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Cold

The windows are closed
But the cold sneaks through
I'm chilled to the bone

A floating scene goes through my mind
A scene with joy and love.
A prom night, with dance and lights,

Too difficult to face the moment,
I buried the memory deep down,
To be the strong rock, where everyone can lean on.

Everyone but not me.

I lost my rock a long time ago
As he decided to move on
As he decided to change city.

I miss him so much,
I can remember his hair,
His sunshine smile,

It's all my fault that he's gone
Because I never said the words he wanted to hear
I showed him every day that I care for him
But it wasn't enough

He left, one day,
I returned home and he has gone.

I was complete, I was loved, and now,
It's only a dark long alley without light.
I'm lost in the dark

I know he must be better where he is.
But I still wait for the door to open and for him to appear.
But it won't ever happen.

I try to call him, it was too difficult
I try to write a letter, too romantic.
I try to be only me, I'm a king at that role play!

But it hurts.

I would take him in my arms and tell him that I love him.
But it's too late, he's gone, to another city, another man.

The phone rang yesterday,
Nobody was on the phone. A mistake call???
No, not really

A knock on the door, I open it
"I'm coming home, can I stay?".
No other words, no answer

He steps in the loft, long memories
I close the door, look at him,
He hasn't changed a bit since last year.

He turns to face me.
"I'll take the couch".
Another melancholy memory,
"No, you take the bed, with me ... forever".

The walls fall down, I love you.

I'm still at the windows,
Looking at the street,
Still chilled to the bones
I hear a noise, He's coming to me,
"Bad memories? or second thoughts"
No never again bad memories, I love him,
And I never regret asking my question.

It's cold, it's winter,
But I feel love, I'm in love
I'm complete, and it all that matter for the moment.
I turned my head

Concerned look on his face.
I smile. I take him in a tight embrace.
I kiss him, tenderly, deeply, like I've never done this before.
Stay back, look at him, he's smiling.

His hands are on my back,
"let's go to bed".
"Wedding is for next month. I love you".
"I know".

I knew at the first glance that he would change my life.
I always thought it's impossible,
Because " I don't believe in love.
I believe in fucking. It's honest, it's efficient.
You get in and out with the maximum of pleasure,
and minimum of bullshit."

For me "Love is something that straight people tell themselves
they're in, so they can get laid.
And they end up hurting each other,
because it was all based on lies to begin with."

But that little persistent kid has somehow gotten in under my wire,
And I fell in love.

And I won't regret it.
He came back!!
And we're together.

Forget the King or the Stud of Liberty Avenue,
I'm in love.

It's still cold
He takes my hand and leads me to the bed,
We lay down, under the duvet.
It's warm,
It's comfortable,
It's love,
It's home.

I'm home,
This is where I belong, where he belongs.
This is us.